I’m not sure what’s wrong with me lately. I delete a lot of words. Yesterday I wrote an entire blog post, then I posted it, then I went back and deleted it. You probably thought I didn’t write anything. But I did. I thought it was boring. I didn’t enjoy re-reading it to myself. I don’t like to be dull when I write. Yes, I can be dull in real life. Hard to believe, but true. Most of the time I prefer you to be dull, too, Reader. I like to ride along in silence…in the car and on the bike and on the plane and on a train. I like people to work quietly around me. Yes, of course I enjoy a good sense of humor, and I’m working with a woman now who is kick-ass witty. Finally! What I like most about her, though, is that she keeps it to herself until she senses that either I or the situation needs it. Then, whammo. Hilarity. At first I thought she would be dull, but she’s not. She’s quiet.
How did I get way over here? I have no idea.
Back to deletions. Yes, on Facebook I post status updates and delete them. Who would want to read that shit?, I ask myself. Who cares? I make comments on others’ walls. Then I go back and delete them. What a dork, I say to myself. Delete. Maybe this is born from a hyper sense of audience. That’s a big part of what I’ve studied. I don’t know. It’s getting worse. It’s a bit debilitating.
On a different note: Yesterday my sweet honey bees stung me about 5 or 6 times in the head and on my face and…yes…somewhere else. I am one big welt today. You should have seen me as this was happening (and it was 100% my own stupidity that caused them to zing me like that)…I looked like a lunatic. I’ve got to get my shit together about these bees. It’s good for me. They sort of demand that you pay close attention to body language and behavior. If you zone out and do things automatically, you pay, sucker.
Not Alice 